Delhi - Start Behaving Yourselves

I am proud Indian. Have always been, will always be. For the past few days though, I feel like I have been let-down  The beautiful girl from Delhi who was brutally gang-raped breathed her last yesterday morning in Singapore. Tributes poured in, Candle Marches all over India, plethora of blogs just like this one, but what mattered was “Damini” had lost the battle. The score now stands at India – 0 Rapists – 1 (Would be much more, but will keep it at 1).

I digged out a few numbers and found out that barring the “Western” and “Civilized” societies of USA, UK and Australia, where Date rapes and Under-age sex, which also constitutes to rape, is incredibly high at about 40%, it is India which has the maximum number of rapes. 2011 stats suggest that Delhi by itself is responsible for about 2.3% of the total rapes in India. This is without taking into account the nearby NCR region. The number would then be around 4%. Shocking numbers for a region which is home to one of the nation's premium universities, and is considered to be a hippy and the “place to be” for youngsters.

I came across this yesterday and have read quite a few articles about the safety of women in New Delhi. Reading these accounts, It is scary to imagine the plight of women in that region. Being able to walk the roads without any fear should be the basic right of a human being. Not getting it in a democratic country is extremely sad. There are rapes happening in Mumbai, Chennai, Kolkata, heck even Los Angeles, London and Sydney. But rarely do we see women being scared of venturing into the roads at late hours in these cities. The whole of India has a patriarchal Society, So where does Delhi get this ridiculous mindset from? Why are women treated like Objects?

The problem isn't the Patriarchal Society as such. The problem lies in what people make out of such a society, and what they are taught by the buzurg and their peers. The roots of a patriarchal society is stemmed around Men protecting their women and not Men being superior to women. New Delhi on the other hand seems to be following Aristotle's line of thought. Aristotle's works depict women as “morally, intellectually and physically  inferior to men. He believed a woman's role to be that of reproduction and serving men in the household. This is the attitude that men in Delhi flaunt. They are of the belief that the female sex is morally obligated to get laid by them, and If she doesn't they are morally obligated to "punish" her. I have never been in Delhi and hence may not be the right person to give you an accurate view of what goes on in Delhi. But this video and the gang-rape incident are examples enough to give one an idea of the narrow mindedness that runs in the veins of Delhites.

Though there have been quite a few rapes and molestation incidents, the brutality of this one brought out the fire in many an Indian. Protests, violent and non violent, were staged in Delhi and other parts of India too. The reach of this incident was so widespread that Robin Van Persie's celebration after his goal against West Bromwich Albion was initially presumed to be a dedication to the rape victim. The protests may at max lead to a speedy resolution of this case. But unless there is a change in the fickle-headed minds of “Men” in Delhi, the rapes will go on. Delhi already has the dubious distinction of being the Rape Capital of India. If this goes on, It may well go up the pecking order and get a similar recognition across the globe.

It is often said in Sports that the Captain should lead from the front. Same goes for you Mr.Capital City. Behave yourselves Delhi. The World is Watching you. We don't want India's name to be stained because of you. 

P.S: I am not defending the existence of Patriarchal Society. I truly believe in Gender Equality. I just believe that It is not possible to change the set up as a whole, it will take decades to do that. We just have to make the best of what exists now. 

What If EPL went the IPL way?

The IPL has a new team, or rather a refurbished team. SunRisers Hyderabad. Yes, a highly ridiculous name for a Sports Team, but they kind of made up for it with their Logo. The IPL menagerie will continue to have 9 teams and will continue to be 2.5 decades long.

The auction is scheduled for Feb 3^rd when 37 players will go under the hammer. That’s a pretty good way of putting it because I feel that’s exactly what happens to the player’s dignity when teams bid for them. It gets hammered. And the players who are left unsold, its one solid hit right on the middle of their head with a Huge hammer.

I got this random idea the other day. What if the Barclays Premier League were to be remodeled based on the IPL? What if say Sir Alex Ferguson did a Lalit Modi? What if the UK wanted to get rid of the highly structured and Century old League Football structure and make way for a more snazzy, sexy, youthful Carlsberg UK Premier League? Sounds fun right?

Lets look at how things would have shaped up in the Carlsberg UK Premier League :

• Clubs would be named Manchester MoonWalkers, Manchester Super Fakers (The Other Manchester club i.e.),Chelsea Knight Sackers, Liverpool Historians, Arsenal Untitled, Tottenham Daredevils etc.
• The team mascots would be people like Robert Pattinson, Jude Law, Kate Beckinsale, Daniel Radcliffe etc.
• "You Will Never Walk Alone", "Glory Glory Manchester United", "Good Ole Arsenal" etc will be replaced by crappier theme songs with Robert Pattinson dancing in it. 
• The cheerleaders will be actually Hot.
• Vijay Mallaya would have tried to bid for a team just because he can (Or Can he?).
• There will be a camera fitted into the football to help viewers get into the game. Lets name it the FootCam.

Players & Auctions  :

• Lionel Messi will be the most sought after player, but he will withdraw from the auctions because he likes only “Pure” Football. No Messi = No Xavi, No Iniesta. 
• Cristiano Ronaldo will hence finally become the most sought after player for a change, and will finally get the money he thinks he deserves. Balon d'or will continue to be just a dream though.
• David Beckham will make his comeback to English football as an Icon player for Manchester MoonWalkers.
• Frank Lampard, Steven Gerrard, Paul Scholes, Ryan Giggs will be the other Icon Players.
• Arsenal Untitled will do a Rajasthan Royals and bid only for young English talent. Paolo Maldini will be their Icon player.
• Mario Balotelli will command the highest price for reasons unknown (When Jadeja can, why not Balotelli).
• Players like Andy Caroll, Kieran Gibbs and other young English talent will become the flavour of the nation after performing in one match. Equivalent of the Yusuf Pathans and Manish Pandeys. 
• Internationals like Samir Nasri, Robin Van Persie, Ibrahamovic will have a standoff with their national team because they don't want to miss the UPL for International commitments. Money Matters for them.
• Players like David Seaman, Alan Shearer, Roberto Carlos, Roy Keane, Cafu will come out of retirement hoping for a 2^nd Football life. They will play the first season and will continue as a "mentor" for the remaining seasons.
• Fernando Torres will still be shit. 

Changes in Rules :

• Football will now be played in 2 halves of 30 minutes each. A shortened format increases interest level doesn't it?
• A goal scored from outside the box will equate to 2 goals.
• There will be a strategic timeouts after the 12.5 and 25 minute mark of each half.
• Substitutions will now be made on the fly.
• A goal of a corner will be called an O2 kamaal goal.
• A goal of a free kick will be called Coca Cola Stunner goal.
• A penalty will be Barclays moment of success.

Fan Reactions :

• The usually loyal English football fans will now start supporting teams based on their favourite players and not their own city.
• The elderly fans and purists will start blaming the Carlsberg UPL for demise of classical football.
• The English national team fans will now have a certified excuse to cover up their national team’s ineffectiveness. “Too much of UPL has made the players money minded, They are just not committed”

What else would change in the EPL? Comments please !!!!

“Man up” and Fight

In light of the rape on a bus, this may be a rant or a voice just like any other. So here it is.

Sad, True Story !!

Let us begin by saying that the root cause of all problems is population. When there are too many eggs, there is bound to be a case of few bad eggs. However, in this instance, it is the case of only a handful of good ones.

We live in a society where “if it isn’t my garbage, it doesn’t really matter” as the given approach to every problem . Let us consider the Thackeray clan and the havoc it wrecked not all that while back. It ranged from forcing shopkeepers to put up the signs outside their shops in Marathi to Bombay Bandh over the demise of a “leader” who was as twisted as they come. It went as far as making arrests over Facebook posts when people summoned the balls to call a spade a spade on their wall. We pride ourselves in being a Democracy with “equal opportunity” and “Freedom of speech” being conferred on us by the makers of the Constitution.  You see the hypocrisy? I do. So coming back to the “garbage” part, why doesn’t anybody who can be heard come to the fore? Why doesn’t anyone do a Anna Hazare? Is it because a law against corruption will solve everything? Well, here’s a shocker, it won’t.

The problems are ingrained in our social fabric.

• Sex education isn’t important.  I cannot fathom why most people are of the view that it is akin to “corrupting” of young minds and Boy, OH boy! how we condemn all that is corrupted. Well, another shocker for dimwits, it is called education for a reason. It quells curiosity and makes both genders aware of the human anatomy something they will learn anyway but not understand, either through peers or the Internet.

• We talk about rape and molestation but most of it is insensitive jibber jabber. Eve teasing has taken a backseat. We boast of a culture where we pray to Goddesses in the morning and then step out later in the day to harass young women who may or may not be skimpily dressed.

• The rules are different for a brother and sister within a household. I totally support this since these are “bad times” but why not ask your son to stay at home too since he might step out in the dead of the night and rape a girl who unfortunately lacks caring parents as yourselves?

• Our nation forgets a disgrace whenever something that is remotely better or slightly more gory comes along. That or the media gets a better story to sensationalise. Did I say sensationalise? I meant, run. Every slight is played up and eventually loses heat. Example 1: Indian cricket’s dismal run. Rest assured if they play an IPL now, all will be forgotten.  Example 2: Arushi Talwar’s murder in 2008. Anyone know what became of that? Example 3: On first Jan, 2008, a mob molested 2 women on the streets of Mumbai.  Were the perpetrators brought to book? If yes, then why wasn’t that played over and over on television? Why the front pages of all leading newspapers weren’t screaming that justice was served? One of two reasons, either it wasn’t or it was a story that doesn’t sell.

• We Gossip. We can’t mind our business. We must discuss how someone’s daughter is wearing skirts or roaming with boys. We gossip and mind our own business when the dignity of the daughter is lost and ostracise the family and whisper “It was just a matter of time” behind the family’s back. In some cases, on its face.

Pardon me for I am known to digress but then again these are issues which incense me. I haven’t touched upon the political aspect of things, which is, yet again, a sorry figure.

• Laws are ineffective. The judiciary is incompetent.  It took us 4 years to mete out justice to a Terrorist who came into our country, massacred and mauled. He was captured and famously ate biriyani behind bars for four years while the tax payer bore his expenses. This was when he was a “high-profile” criminal. Stop pretending that you are safe in your bubble because you are not, especially if you are a woman. If you are a man, your sister, daughter and your mom aren't safe either. Ajmal Kasab’s victims had to wait for four years for some semblance of justice, you might have to wait an eternity.

• I doubt anything can bring justice to a rape victim. It isn’t just the human body that is violated, a spirit is marred. Imagine getting slapped by a stranger in full public view because you are in wrong  company (by wrong I mean a man) or inappropriately dressed (according to him) and multiply that insult and humiliation by a 1000 times. That is how it would feel.  Meanwhile, you have upholders of the law that are of the view that the rapes will go on because “she asked for it” and more shockingly, “it is consensual most of the times.” What I want to ask these policemen is: Is that how you justify yourselves when your respective wives are not feeling it on some nights? Kindly visit the Tehelka website for more material that might make that nerve in the temple throb with fury. Why these men aren’t not stripped of their badge and honour? Why a more thorough background research isn’t conducted into their morals and beliefs before drafting such men into the force or are we so short on labour resources that anyone with a penis and a sack of balls qualifies?

• Rape within marriage is not a crime in India. Pray, tell me how not. It is because you have obtained the society’s approval to have sex and can do as you deem fit? Is it because you own a being or another’s will?

There is a widespread uproar demanding capital punishment for rapists. That will not solve anything. It will lead to an increase in murder after rape so that there is no one to testify against the culprit. I’d propose castration after identification. Identify the culprit. Let the newspapers scream his name in their pages and do it quick, for we as a public are blessed with a short memory. Let him be condemned and shamed. Let him not “get it up” for the rest of his life and live with the shame of this heinous act.

More importantly, teach your sons to respect women. Let equality be preached at home. Make it mandatory for every girl to learn some form at martial art and make it mandatory at school level.  More than sewing and stitching, a girl should learn how to protect herself and her honour. Make that part of the academic curriculum.

Most importantly, educate. Educate about sex, respect and equality. Teach morals at home and at school.

And to women, take a stand. You are not on this earth to marry and reproduce. That is just a part of the plan. Be independent for your parents and/ or siblings are not going to be around forever to protect you. Don’t take bullshit in a relationship or in a marriage. It is not okay for him to hit you or abuse you and stop telling yourself it will not happen again because it will. Walk out. You deserve better.

Lastly, let it never be forgotten that “female empowerment” has “female” as a prefix because our sex has to fight for it. Unlike our male counterparts, we aren’t given privileges on a platter. So, as they say, “man up” and start fighting.

P.S : Thanks Bhavya for letting me share this. You can find more of her posts here. 

RajniKanth Day in History !!

December 12^th, 1950 is one of the most important days in the history of mankind. After all Shivaji Rao Gaikwad aka RajniKanth was born on that day. He turns 62 today and millions of fans are celebrating. No better treat for them than the release of Sivaji in 3D. RajniKanth is not just the SuperStar, he has become a cultural Icon. Tamil Cinema = RajniKanth.

I can go on with the adulation  but moving on. Being RajniKanth day, there have been many more landmark events which have changed the course of history in some way or the other on December 12^th.  Nothing more altering than his birth of course, but you do get what I mean. So, here is looking at a few of those events :

1901: Gugliemo Marconi succeeded in sending the first ever transatlantic radio transmission. He had transmitted the Morse Code Signal for letter S from Cornwall, England to Newfoundland, Canada , Over 2000 miles apart. He disapproved the cynics who believed that the curvature of earth would limit transmission to 200 miles or less. This was Marconi’s way of Rajnikanthing the non-believers. What’s more, he received the nobel prize in Physics in 1909 for the same. Only because he did this on 12^th December.

1912: The original Mona Lisa painting was recovered 2 years after its theft from the Louvre Museum in Paris. It was recovered in Florence, from the hotel room of an Italian waiter by the name of Vincenzo Peruggia. Legend has it that on Dec 12^th of the previous 2 years, Vincenzo heard booming voices in his room which went something like “Kanna, I am coming”. He ignored the first 2 warnings, but the 3^rd one was a bit too much for him and he left the painting unhidden in his room to make it easier for the search party. Though unproven, you know it’s true.   

1943: Tide detergent was introduced. The detergent which gives you the whitest of white. How did they get the formula to make such a detergent? They just got lucky that their launch date coincided with RajniKanth day. 

1963: Kenya gained independence from the British forces. Kenya African National Union (KANU) headed by Jomo Kenyatta took over the country. Why did it happen? RajniKanth on his 13^th birthday wanted a lion as a gift. His parents asked him to go get it. He swam his way from Mumbai to Nairobi. As the clock struck 12, RajniKanth had reached the Kenyan shores. The British knew it was a lost cause. You know what happened next.

1981: Yuvraj Singh was born. How do you think he managed to hit those 6 sixes against Stuart Broad? How do you think he managed to win the World Cup for India, in spite of not being in the best of health? How do you think he can hit sixes so effortlessly? You really want me to answer these questions? I am sure you know why.

And just in case you want some more trivia, Washington DC and New Delhi, the capitals of the two biggest democracies, i.e. USA and India were established as capitals on this very day. Washington in 1800 and Delhi in 1911. I am sure you won’t ever forget this now.  

My First Marathon- Ok, 10km Run !!

I am a pretty lazy individual. Someone who wanted to do things, but later. Walking from my house to the nearby market was a strict no at most times. So, running a marathon was going to be as tough as Pi Patel’s rendezvous with Richard Parker.

I came to know about the Wipro Chennai Marathon a few days ago. Though I was not much confident of doing any good in it, I just had to give it a shot. After all , this couldn't be done later. There were 3 categories. I chose the 10km run. The full and half marathons were never going to be my thing. Riding 42kms on a bike is hellacious, I mean how could I possibly walk/run that much. Having done 5-6kms on the treadmill, 10km was just a bit further. I was pretty “confident” of doing it.

2^nd of December was the D-Day. IIT Madras was the venue. The entire course was within the beautiful IIT campus. The run was to begin at 7:00 AM. I was there at 6:30 and joined my fellow runners who were doing their Warm-ups, choreographed by an instructor. I was joined by a couple of my friends, who were inevitably late. A shot of an energy drink and a banana later, we were all set. As the countdown trickled down to zero, off we were along with hundreds of fellow runners. It was showtime.

The first couple of kilometers went pretty well. The adrenaline was pumping and the confidence of finishing the run was growing. The legs held up well and weren’t behaving funny as yet. As we reached the first fueling station, around 3 and a bit kilometers from the start line, things were just getting a bit tougher. Jogging had been replaced by more of walking. Though the stamina was still there, legs were starting to make noises of their own. Every passing kilometer made it more of a “mind over body” matter. I pushed, pushed and pushed, alternating between jogging and walking.

The finish line made its much sought after appearance, and so did a bit adrenaline rush. A dash to the finish line was made, and when I did cross the line, immense satisfaction. Being able to complete the run was an incredible achievement in itself for me, considering that I never practiced even a bit and the longest distance I have ever walked in my life wouldn’t have been more than 3kms.

A special shout out to Wipro and other organizers. The marathon was organized quite brilliantly and It was great fun to be a part of it. The IIT campus was as beautiful as it has always been, making the run extremely easy on the eyes. The Chennai weather too was extremely considerate and spared us from exhaustion due to heat. Overall, it was a Sunday well spent.

I did make a 10km run sound like a hike to Mount Everest, but that was how difficult I had considered it to be. Now that I succeeded in getting done with it, I have my sights set on the next marathon event. This time, with some practice, I might just give the Half Marathon a shot.